Friday, September 4, 2009

"Valley Girls" Can Fly To, But Not From, The Mall (aka Heathrow)

When we flew to Vienna after a brief stopover in London at the start of our 2006 European trip, we left from Heathrow's Terminal 4.  Check-in was a mad-cap circus.  First, it came about two weeks after the alleged attempt to blow up airliners flying out of the U.K. by mixing together volatile liquids taken onto the aircraft in carry-on luggage.  That (thankfully) aborted terrorist act is what brought us today's familiar-to-every-frequent-flyer restrictions on the amount of liquids and gels that can be packed in our hand luggage.  But in the immediate wake of this bomb attempt, Heathrow and British transportation security officials weren't quite how to best keep this threat from being repeated.  As a result, getting checked in for our Vienna flight, and getting through security, was a protracted process.

Since then, a brand-new terminal, Heathrow 5, has been completed and most, if not all, British Airways flights arrive and depart from that venue.  The terminal appears to have been adequately designed to take into account all post-9/11 security measures.  The real danger from flying out of Terminal 5 is not terrorists, but retailers.  In fact, Terminal 5 looks to we Americans like a giant shopping mall (the Czech's and other Europeans probably would call it a "hypermarket"). 

You could probably show up at Terminal 5 with nothing more than your e-ticket and the clothes on your back, clear security (very quickly, of course), then shop on the other side for all of the clothing, toiletries, electronic gizmos, and anything else you would need (except maybe for ski equipment or scuba gear) for vacation or business travel anywhere in the world.  The "airport" part (with the boarding gates and aircraft) almost seems like an afterthought.

Cindy went shopping at Harrods for two new umbrellas:  One to replace hers which had broken during the light wind and rain that fell during our trip back to the hotel from Buckingham Palace, and one for me to replace the el-cheapo one I'd bought earlier the same day on the way to the palace. 

And if you're a "Valley Girl", you could buy the cheapest British Airways one-way ticket you could find, take the "Tube" (cheapest way to go) out to Heathrow Terminal 1, then hop on the Heathrow Connect train (pricey from London, but a free ride between terminals), check-in for your flight to get a boarding pass (your "e-ticket to the Terminal 5 mall), shop til you dropped, then toss away your ticket and go home.  The savings from not actually taking your vacation trip should cover your purchases, and the cost of the unused plane ticket.

Such a deal.